...Warning...this is a long one!

Well, first let me give you some words I would use to describe the last seven days and some of my emotions....hopeful, excited, anxious, overwhelmed, unsure, crazy, proud, thankful, cautious, angry, worried, eager, successful, fair, calm, disgusted...I mean really the list could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.

So I guess I should start from the beginning....

Tuesday, as you know, if you read my last post, I got my measurements after a month with a personal trainer, and I lost over 10 inches total in one month...proud and successful...absolutely!

Wednesday I went with some of my co-workers on a visit to a school in Raleigh to see how they do some things and all I can say is WOW! I have never seen anything like it. I was so impressed with the staff and students of this school. Students had full ownership of the program we were observing and that is because of the amazing leadership and staff at the school and how they have chosen to implement it. You could see, hear, and feel the relationships the students had with their teachers and fellow classmates and it was amazing! I have totally bought in and I can only hope my school will take on this program and create an atmosphere of even half the caliber of what I saw in Raleigh.

Thursday and Friday I was told I would be the only administrator on campus for the majority of both days. When I found this out, I was sure someone had lost their mind. I have been there all of two months, what do I know??? Things at school have been a little crazy lately, so I had some concerns. The students have spring fever and understandably need a break, as do the staff and administration. Students are acting like they have no sense. Luckily, the expectations were made very clear Thursday morning by our principal that we were not going to tolerate any more of the foolishness, which honestly made things for me much easier once he was gone; for that I am thankful. During those two days there were times of shock and disbelief as students tried to push the limits to see if the promise of the administration would be kept. As I began to reflect at the end of the day Friday I had a feeling of success when I realized that Thursday and Friday were like night and day. Students, I believe, got the message Thursday and realized Ms. Greer was no joke! I was going to keep the promises made to regulate. I do not enjoy sending students home, I have feelings of anxiety, disappointment and sadness each time I have to do it, but a promise is a promise. I do want to give a lot of credit to the people that I work with. They truly are a blessing. Without the people who went out of their way to help and encourage me and even neglected some of their own responsibilities, I may have lost much of my sanity!

To put it simply, Saturday and Sunday were about relaxation and rejuvenation after a very long emotional week with many ups and downs. A little but of running, some eating, some basketball, and lots of sleep consumed my weekend.

Monday was not too bad. I almost think it was like the calm before the storm. I was productive and able to catch up on some work I was behind on from the prior week. Oh, I did hit my 40lb weight loss! I am still hoping for at least 10 more...we shall see!

Today, the emotions were high from the moment I walked in the door, partially due to the fact I had very little sleep last night. I was thinking about my dog who had medical issues the day before and I couldn't help but think I had done something to make her sick, it was also hot in the house, and honestly I also need a new pillow! Anyone who knows me knows if I do not get good sleep, I am not a happy camper. So as soon as I got my day going, I kind of thought I might need to go back to bed, but we all know that was not an option. By 9am I was appalled at so many things I had already experienced, racism and general hatred being the biggest disappointments. Also, to blame one person for the way a group of people acts in asinine. We all make our own decisions; we must man up and take responsibility for our own actions. I have to admit, because I was so disgusted by some of the things I saw and heard this morning, my emotions got the best of me and I had to go to my office and just have a little bit of a breakdown. It lasted all of about 15 minutes and then I was fine. Thank God for my fabulous co-worker who unfortunately got the privilege of experiencing this emotional breakdown...all I can say is bless his heart...he had no idea what he was getting into! But he was so kind and supportive.

If there is one thing I could say to sum up all of this, it would be that I have realized that no matter how bad the day or situation, when you are surrounded by good grounded people everything will always be ok.
There will never be enough words to express my thanks to the people I work with. I do not think they will ever really know how much I depended on them this week and how each and every one of them came through for me without even knowing it. For that I am truly blessed!

Honestly, a year ago,  if I had experienced half of what I did the last seven days, I do not think I would still feel good at the end of the day like I do today. I truly believe the rebuilding process is in full motion and I am really becoming a new and better version of me!

I hope everyone has a great rest of the week. I am headed out of town tomorrow evening for the kickoff of celebrations for the upcoming wedding of one of my best friends.

Thanks for reading! Onward and upward my friends!

Success!!!

So today I visited my new hero, my personal trainer, and we did all my measurements to see what has happened in this month of training....there is only one word I can give that would describe the results....SUCCESS!!!!

I am very pleased. Some may not care, but I am going to share because I am just that proud of what I was able to do this month, and I will tell you it was not easy! I could not have done it without Danny or my training partner Alyson.

-2 inches Bust

-2 inches Waist

-1 inch Abdomen

-1 inch Hips

-3 inches Thighs

-1/2 inch Calves

-1/2 inch Arms

Yep...thats rights...a total of 10 inches in one month. I honestly was shocked! It was never easy, but it was totally worth it. I hope to see even more results next month.

Other notable changes today...an improvement in my cardio fitness, muscular endurance, and flexibity. I did not lose very much weight, just a couple of pounds, but I have to believe I probably did lose some fat and just gained some muscle.

It can only get better from here. I feel good and I am getting stronger. Now I just need to work more on my running. Its time to get my speed and mileage up!

Its onward and upward from here! :)



...updates

...so how is my rebuilding going? I think for the most part I am right on schedule!

1. I have been seeing a personal trainer 3 days a week for a month now and doing it on my own 2 more days a week. Tomorrow I will go back for my official 1 month measurement results...but honestly, I think my body has changed a lot this last month. I may not have lost much weight, but I know things are changing because of the fit of my clothes. Success? I think so!

2. My job, I love it. It is a new challenge everyday. Some days are good, some days are bad, but at the end of each week I know I did the best I could do and I am proud of what I have done. I am building some pretty good relationships with the students and I will do anything I can to make sure they are successful. I am pretty sure the students I have had to work with know that.

3. Running another 5k? Well there was one I wanted to run, but it is schedules for a weekend that I have already scheduled to be in Memphis. So I am looking for another one to run in the next few months, if you know of any let me know! I want to try to get a couple more 5k's in before I start working on that 10k I have to run before the year is out.

4. I have starting working with a mortgage broker and real estate agent, so that is a true start to looking for my very 1st house. I do have to admit I am somewhat hesitant, because we were told today AP's may go down to 10 month employees. If that is the case I will only be making about $20 more a year than I was as a teacher, so being able to afford a house may not be possible right now. :(  (And while I am on the money note, as much as I love being an AP if I am going to be taking that much of a pay cut, I may just go back to teaching, because that sure is not enough pay for what I have deal with on a daily basis!)

5. Have I found a good man? No, not yet, but I know it will all come in time. God has a plan for me, I know that, and I have to have faith he plan will be shown in time.

6. Finally, the blog. I think I have been pretty good. I have tried to write at least once a week. You may not always like what I write or care about what I write, but I always feel better after I have written. It is quite cathartic!

I hope everyone enjoys the week!

Until next time...onward and upward my friends!

Hit play...please!

So first off, I think I finally have come up with a name for my blog that I like. Under Construction...Building a new me this year! I think this is fitting as I have set some goals and now its time to get to work to accomplish those goals and become a better me this year! What do you think about the new title???

So, I feel like someone has hit the pause button on my life and forgot to come back and hit play. I feel like I am stuck in the same place while everyone else is passing me by. As many things as I have accomplished over the last few months, I still feel like I am literally at a stand still. Trust me, I am not trying to rush life, but really, I almost feel like I am moving backwards at times.  I am trying to stay positive, as that is the goal this year, but I just wonder what it is that I am missing. Many of my friends are moving on, moving away, getting married and having children. I almost feel like we have less in common the more their lives change and mine stays the same. I feel like I am doing all the right things and setting the right goals- getting in shape, getting the new job, getting my finances in order, house hunting, etc...but unfortunately for me it is still not enough, I feel as if I am at a standstill. I do not want to sound selfish, but honestly it is how I feel. I just do not feel fulfilled. I just want someone to remember they forgot about me and hit my play button in life so I can at least catch up to everyone else!

Thankful Thursday!

This week has been a little overwhelming, so today I thought I would make a list of some of the things I am thankful for...

This week I am thankful for...

1. My job- as eventful, challenging and stressfull as it can be at times, I really do like it!
2. The beautiful weather we have been having. It may not be that warm yet, but its better than 30 degrees!
3. My wonderful friend Iva and her wisdom- she has taught me more than she will ever know!
4. A good nights sleep 3 nights in a row
5. My new personal trainer- he is really challenging me!
6. Alyson- for going to the personal trainer with me- it would not be near as fun without her.
7. A good cup of coffee- it gets me going in the morning.
8. My new friends at work-its hard making new friends in this new position I am in.
9. The positive relationships I am building with some of my new students.
10. The fact that some of my old students have not forgotten about me and they still check in on me.
11. Mental and emotional strength.
12. God's Grace today and everyday!

"I think I learned to appreciate and treasure each day, because you don't know how many you are going to be given" ~Sandra Day O'Connor

Have a good one...onward and upward my friends!

My Bucket List...

So since I am starting fresh, I thought it might be a good idea to start my bucket list. So over the last few days every time something comes to mind that I want to do, I write it down...there is not rhyme or reason to the order, they are just written as I think of them...I hope to add more later.

Enjoy!

1.     Go to Greece

2.     Visit all 50 states

3.     Have a picnic in Central Park

4.     Ice Skate in Rockefeller Center

5.     Attend a major sporting event (Superbowl, World Series, US Open)

6.     Ride on a train

7.     Be an extra in a movie

8.     Run a 10k

9.     Make out with a cute boy in the rain

10.  Read the Bible in its entirety

11.  Take a road trip out west

12.  Learn to speak Spanish

13.  Learn to dance

14.  Become a principal of a school

15.  Learn how to golf

16.  Learn how to ski (water and snow)

17.  Achieve and maintain financial stability

18.  Go the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade in NYC

19.  Fly in a hot air balloon

20.  Own a pair of Christian Louboutin shoes

21.  Volunteer at a Children’s Hospital

22.  Fly First Class

23.  Learn sign language

24.  See the ball drop at midnight at new years in NYC

25.  Visit Ireland

26.  Visit Japan

27.  Kiss the Blarney Stone

28.  Ride in a helicopter

29.  See a glacier

30.  See the 7 Wonders of the World

31.  Feel and know true love

32.  Have my own children

33.  Adopt a child

34.  Own a cupcake shop

35.  Go to Vegas

36.  Visit Mt. Rushmore

37.  Build an igloo

38.  Write a letter to the editor

39.  Run for an elected position

40.  Do 100 push ups consecutively

41.  Visit wine country

42.  Ride an elephant

43.  Take surfing lessons

44.  Go on an African Safari

Need some prayers....

So, I do not ask for this often, but after the last week or so I am asking for a few prayers...so here we go....

1. Please pray for my health. I think I am getting Bronchitis and now is not the time for this. I had to leave work early yesterday, sat through a funeral yesterday with a pretty high temperature, and today sat through a meeting from 9-5 still not feeling well. I really need to be back at work tomorrow to catch up, because those of you who know me, know I do not like work piling up on my desk. Get it done is my motto!

2.  Please pray for me to have some patience. When I took this new job I knew exactly what I was getting into. I am not naive, I know I will not make everyone happy all the time and I know I will have to make tough decisions, but I swear, with some people there is no winning for losing. Pray I can get past those few, and so far I mean very few who may not always like my decisions or how I handle something and to remember that I know I am doing the best I can and I am trying to do the best thing for my students. 

3. Please pray for peace. Peace for me, but more importantly, my many former students and friends who have lost a very special young man this week. I knew it was going to be hard to go to the funeral yesterday, but I never imagined how difficult until I was actually there. Watching the same people hurt so much over the loss of a friend not once but now twice in less than a year is devastating. My heart is so heavy with not only my own grief over the loss of these two special people, but for all these young people. There is only so much they can take. I pray, and I hope you will too, that God will give us the peace we need to get through this difficult time.

Thank you!