...Warning...this is a long one!

Well, first let me give you some words I would use to describe the last seven days and some of my emotions....hopeful, excited, anxious, overwhelmed, unsure, crazy, proud, thankful, cautious, angry, worried, eager, successful, fair, calm, disgusted...I mean really the list could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.

So I guess I should start from the beginning....

Tuesday, as you know, if you read my last post, I got my measurements after a month with a personal trainer, and I lost over 10 inches total in one month...proud and successful...absolutely!

Wednesday I went with some of my co-workers on a visit to a school in Raleigh to see how they do some things and all I can say is WOW! I have never seen anything like it. I was so impressed with the staff and students of this school. Students had full ownership of the program we were observing and that is because of the amazing leadership and staff at the school and how they have chosen to implement it. You could see, hear, and feel the relationships the students had with their teachers and fellow classmates and it was amazing! I have totally bought in and I can only hope my school will take on this program and create an atmosphere of even half the caliber of what I saw in Raleigh.

Thursday and Friday I was told I would be the only administrator on campus for the majority of both days. When I found this out, I was sure someone had lost their mind. I have been there all of two months, what do I know??? Things at school have been a little crazy lately, so I had some concerns. The students have spring fever and understandably need a break, as do the staff and administration. Students are acting like they have no sense. Luckily, the expectations were made very clear Thursday morning by our principal that we were not going to tolerate any more of the foolishness, which honestly made things for me much easier once he was gone; for that I am thankful. During those two days there were times of shock and disbelief as students tried to push the limits to see if the promise of the administration would be kept. As I began to reflect at the end of the day Friday I had a feeling of success when I realized that Thursday and Friday were like night and day. Students, I believe, got the message Thursday and realized Ms. Greer was no joke! I was going to keep the promises made to regulate. I do not enjoy sending students home, I have feelings of anxiety, disappointment and sadness each time I have to do it, but a promise is a promise. I do want to give a lot of credit to the people that I work with. They truly are a blessing. Without the people who went out of their way to help and encourage me and even neglected some of their own responsibilities, I may have lost much of my sanity!

To put it simply, Saturday and Sunday were about relaxation and rejuvenation after a very long emotional week with many ups and downs. A little but of running, some eating, some basketball, and lots of sleep consumed my weekend.

Monday was not too bad. I almost think it was like the calm before the storm. I was productive and able to catch up on some work I was behind on from the prior week. Oh, I did hit my 40lb weight loss! I am still hoping for at least 10 more...we shall see!

Today, the emotions were high from the moment I walked in the door, partially due to the fact I had very little sleep last night. I was thinking about my dog who had medical issues the day before and I couldn't help but think I had done something to make her sick, it was also hot in the house, and honestly I also need a new pillow! Anyone who knows me knows if I do not get good sleep, I am not a happy camper. So as soon as I got my day going, I kind of thought I might need to go back to bed, but we all know that was not an option. By 9am I was appalled at so many things I had already experienced, racism and general hatred being the biggest disappointments. Also, to blame one person for the way a group of people acts in asinine. We all make our own decisions; we must man up and take responsibility for our own actions. I have to admit, because I was so disgusted by some of the things I saw and heard this morning, my emotions got the best of me and I had to go to my office and just have a little bit of a breakdown. It lasted all of about 15 minutes and then I was fine. Thank God for my fabulous co-worker who unfortunately got the privilege of experiencing this emotional breakdown...all I can say is bless his heart...he had no idea what he was getting into! But he was so kind and supportive.

If there is one thing I could say to sum up all of this, it would be that I have realized that no matter how bad the day or situation, when you are surrounded by good grounded people everything will always be ok.
There will never be enough words to express my thanks to the people I work with. I do not think they will ever really know how much I depended on them this week and how each and every one of them came through for me without even knowing it. For that I am truly blessed!

Honestly, a year ago,  if I had experienced half of what I did the last seven days, I do not think I would still feel good at the end of the day like I do today. I truly believe the rebuilding process is in full motion and I am really becoming a new and better version of me!

I hope everyone has a great rest of the week. I am headed out of town tomorrow evening for the kickoff of celebrations for the upcoming wedding of one of my best friends.

Thanks for reading! Onward and upward my friends!